The breath of life
by lona-Violet Flower
Summary: Bullies often have subtle, artful ways of making you feel miserable; they seemed to find all your weak points and aggressively attack them. Cliques spread nasty rumors like wildfire and your so-called "friends" abandoned you. You was taunted for being a late bloomer, for acting like a baby. th


_The breath of life _

Bullies often have subtle, artful ways of making you feel miserable; they seemed to find all your weak points and aggressively attack them. Cliques spread nasty rumors like wildfire and your so-called "friends" abandoned you. You was taunted for being a late bloomer, for acting like a baby.

_It's like the time has gone back 11 years back and I am watching myself again. i want to go there and help her, i want to help myself but i cannot move i want to go to her and stop the man from touching the six year old me ._

_"__hey pretty girl "_

_"__come to me we will have so much fun"_

_"__do not be shy , come here "_

_"__come to me "_

_I do not want to watch it i want to stop the man i hate what he did to me i want to wake up i want it to stop . stop the man from calling me his i hate his voice ,i hate the smell of the alcohol that is coming from him , i hate every thing about that night ,i want to hid ,i want to run _

_I want the man to never find me _

_But he found me i could not help the six year old of me _

_"__ha! found you ,now stop crying girl"_

_I hear the man say to me but i cried harder it hurt to move the man had his arm around me I wanted him to leave me alone, I heard the six year old Bella cry harder as he slapped me _

_"__Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh"_

_I heard the scream to the little bella _

_I watched as the little girl fainted _

**"****It was a dream ,it was only a dream" I heard myself say **

**But it wasn't it all happen to the six year old bella no one came to save me I do not know when I waked up but the bad man was not there and I knew no one was going to come and find me they would be to happy that I left them . **

**I am seventeen and still the dream comes to me .i want them to stop ,I want to forget that night but I can't **

**Every person in my life hates me I want the last year of high school to be over , I want to leave this place …..**

**When I was born my mother left me to live her life and left me with my father, my father and his wife took me in their home.**

**Renee hates me because she see's the women face whom her husband slept and it does not help that I live under the same roof .my father worked in navy till I was 15 and then he become chief of forks police station .my half brothers are a year old than me .**

**They were happy to have a sister but when they turned seven they started hating me .The day they left me in the park was the day was the last day i went anywhere with them.**

**Every day I hear people call me fatty, ugly swans. It hurts to know what people thing about you it feels like they are repeatedly stabbing you with a huge knife it always hurts.**

**What hurts more is that even my brothers take pleasure knowing that I am hurting when they call me fatty or ugly and when they let their girlfriend Alice and Rose punch me throw things at me and the smile on my brothers face hurts the most than the things they throw at me **

**I wanted friends ,I wanted people to invite me to their home for sleepovers and party I did not wanted to fell lonely .**

**I want to breath ….**

**CHAPTER 2**

_Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,_

_And sorry I could not travel both_

_And be one traveler, long I stood_

_And looked down one as far as I could_

_To where it bent in the undergrowth;_

_Then took the other, as just as fair,_

_And having perhaps the better claim,_

_Because it was grassy and wanted wear;_

_Though as for that the passing there_

_Had worn them really about the same,_

_And both that morning equally lay_

_In leaves no step had trodden black._

_Oh, I kept the first for another day!_

_Yet knowing how way leads on to way,_

_I doubted if I should ever come back._

_I shall be telling this with a sigh_

_Somewhere ages and ages hence:_

_Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—_

_I took the one less traveled by,_

_And that has made all the difference._

**I do not know how much time has passed from I have woken from the nightmare, I do not want to leave the only place which I feel safe in the whole world **

**All thing changes when you become older when I was seven I wanted to look ugly ,I wanted to be fat so no one can call me pretty again ,I do not wanted the ugly man to touch me I wanted to be fat so I do not fell the touch of the ugly man ,**

**That time when everyone in school called me ugly, fatty I felt so happy, I used to laugh in their face and walk away .i was so relieved that no one want touch me anymore . At that time my only goal was to become fat.**

**What I wanted I had become, I was so relived to look in the mirror and see myself and look how I have become the fatty **

**But now I do not even want to look in the mirror ,when ever by mistake I look in the mirror all I see is the bulge that sits on my hip, when I look down to my stomach I see three tires that are with me constantly ,when I move my arm I see all the fat wobble .**

**Now a day's I hate to see myself in the mirror.**

**Standing by my bed, I close my eye and dress myself. As I finish dressing I walk to vanity and pick up my hair brush running it through my long brown hair.**

**My hair is the only thing which is beautiful or the only thing I consider pretty about me. **

**No one is home today Jasper and Emmett went to Cullen house because he was throwing a party **

**"****To enjoy last day of freedom"**

**Edward Cullen word not my .It's not like I am invited .nobody wants to invite the fatty swan as my brothers friend call me to their party they are afraid I will eat all their food **

**My family the swans are not rich as the Cullen's or the Whitlock or the Hale but we are not even so poor **

**My father is a chief of police in the small town forks and Renee is a kindergarten teacher they both have work today Renee has parents' teacher meting so she went and Charlie left early in the morning and Emmett and Jasper left now .**

**When I am sure no one is home I climb down the stair and go to kitchen and toke a banana and a bottle of water and went to my room. **

**My room is in second floor everyone had room downstairs, I am fed up from climbing the stairs all the time and if it was not less I even walk to school because Emmett and Jasper went over the budget when they went to buy a car so I did not get the car and now I have to walk to school every day .**

**With all the exercise and dieting I do, you would think I would lose some pounds. Nope doesn't happen **

**I am working in the library to save some money so I can buy a car but the car have to wait few more months because I do not have that much money till now and it's not like I am going to ask Charlie to give me some money,I do not want to face the disappointment or felling pain when he tells me no so there is no way I can get the car right this moment.**

**Whole day has passed and I did nothing but spend it in my room **

**I fell so lonely, I don't have any friends and it's not like I can have any boyfriend ,if you want a boyfriend you have to be size 10 to get a boy friend.**

**I always thing what will it be to have a boyfriend but I do not think I will be ever feel anything like think in my whole life .**

**It was the last thought in my mind when I felt asleep.**


End file.
